i thought i've learnt to put the past behind. i thought i've learnt howta love u for who u are now. i thought i've learnt howta gif u up when u find ur mr. right. i thought i've learnt how to be happy as long as i can see a smile on ur face. after all these i thought, i think i was wrong all these while.
i nvr put the past behind in the firz place, i only chose not to think about it.
i like u for who u are now, but i've never stopped loving who you were.
the moment i saw u expressing your happiness in ur nick, all i thought was, i shld've told u earlier.
the moment you said u were happy, that a simple reply put a smile on u, all i felt was jealousy.
that place in your heart, it was mine 5 yrs ago. when evrything seemed right, evrything seemed happy. a simple "i love you", a simple "<3" could make us so happy for days. but now, that place is filled up by another guy, and all i can think is, what have i done, why isn't it me. and all i could think of is blaming myself for what i had done b4 i met u. but all i had done was out of true love for someone who didn't deserve my love in the firz place. the first that broke my heart, the one that broke it into 64 pieces. i wished, i hoped, that u wld come back to me one day. but all hopes are gone now, u're forever gone, 5 yrs have been too long, even a baby 5 yrs back wld be in nursery by now. can i wish u happiness? the only thing i can say is sorry i thought i could, but i simply can't. i dunno how to. i'm selfish, love is. that is all i know.
a return to this path of loneliness. leave me alone, i just want a peaceful night for the moment and return to my fake smiles tomorrow. i've always been doing that, smiling for the sake of smiling, not becuz i'm happy.
damn, jus when i was telling myself not to scold the "f" word anymore, u made me realised how deserving this world is of my "f" words. but, i guess, there is no point in scolding the "f" word anymore. stop the vulgarities, let it end today.
this is my life, my story, and you will never be a part of it again.
good bye.
(i wonder why, till now, i have never mentioned her name in my blog at all, from the firz post to now. i wonder. why do i always love ppl who never deserved my love in the firz place, or rather, not appreciative of it. damn.)
Sunday, February 15, 2009
hillsborough
well, i've been emo on this day since 2004. little surprise i was emo today as well. what happened in 2004 i do not wanna say much about it, since it's all in the past. basically, it's things that i didn't expect to happen at the last hour of v-day in 2004. stupid girl, made a crazy guy who's so much in love with her, cry a hell lot of tears. simple?
but this year, kinda different. whole day started out fairly well, as all v-days were in the past. went out for the nus engin talk thingy. all guys. no girls. BAH!
but the talk somehow made me wanna piah my studies in NUS. not to say that i did not want to piah in the firz place. LOL! the possibility of studying in UK as either SEP or probably internship made me wanna go there. so that, if possible, catch some games at anfield. take a picture there, and tell evryone, i have been to anfield. and oso the double degree offered by nus for ee and biz. well, looking forward to it. XD
and somewhat, because of that, thinking about anfield and stuff. i was reminded about hillsborough. dun ask me why, i oso dunno. so went to thisisanfield.com, looked thru forums. then the emo began with kenny dalgish's article on the incident. the whole article was full of sadness, his love for the club and fans. it was simply overwhelming. very sad la. hai.
emo liao. dun want talk about it liao.
gd nite, and happy v-day, tho it's over.
but this year, kinda different. whole day started out fairly well, as all v-days were in the past. went out for the nus engin talk thingy. all guys. no girls. BAH!
but the talk somehow made me wanna piah my studies in NUS. not to say that i did not want to piah in the firz place. LOL! the possibility of studying in UK as either SEP or probably internship made me wanna go there. so that, if possible, catch some games at anfield. take a picture there, and tell evryone, i have been to anfield. and oso the double degree offered by nus for ee and biz. well, looking forward to it. XD
and somewhat, because of that, thinking about anfield and stuff. i was reminded about hillsborough. dun ask me why, i oso dunno. so went to thisisanfield.com, looked thru forums. then the emo began with kenny dalgish's article on the incident. the whole article was full of sadness, his love for the club and fans. it was simply overwhelming. very sad la. hai.
emo liao. dun want talk about it liao.
gd nite, and happy v-day, tho it's over.
Sunday, February 08, 2009
OMG
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
i'm jus gonna sing that all the way till i fall aslp. i'm gonna dream abt torres scoring the goal again and again and again until i wake up. and when i wake up, i'll buy a set of new paper to see match report of my BELOVED LIVERPOOL!!!
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
i was still havin a hard time thinkin abt who to vote as motm, cuz evryone was playing jus so good today. the exception was reina, i tot he had a bad day, conceding 2 easy goals that he wld normally have saved. well, great play by team. but my motm will definitely go to torres. 2nd wld be benayoun. benayoun was so "gerrard" today. lol, "gerrard" is my new way of saying godlike! LOL!!! seriously, he was running evrywhere, pokin thru the def like nobody's business. but torres is still the best, 2 touches, 1 goal, 1 assist. superb. simply outstanding, i wld haf to say torres was simply "torres". "torres" is my alternative for the best. LOL.
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
ok, now is ac milan match, mebbe i shld jus watch it since i'm still awake. I'M SO HAPPY NOW I CAN'T SLP. I WLDN'T BELIEVE THAT U'RE SLPING IF U'RE A LIVERPOOL FAN! CUZ YOU'LL NEVER SLEEP ALONE! HAHAHA!
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
emo day ended in an outstanding day for me. I LOVE LIVERPOOL! i wanna go dere to work after i graduate. haha. muz find a job there. even better if there's internship chance over there. COME ON U REDS! and ya, i'm glad that i didn't stay on for lan with zhou peng they all, else i wldn't be able to watch such a great match.
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
i'm jus gonna sing that all the way till i fall aslp. i'm gonna dream abt torres scoring the goal again and again and again until i wake up. and when i wake up, i'll buy a set of new paper to see match report of my BELOVED LIVERPOOL!!!
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
i was still havin a hard time thinkin abt who to vote as motm, cuz evryone was playing jus so good today. the exception was reina, i tot he had a bad day, conceding 2 easy goals that he wld normally have saved. well, great play by team. but my motm will definitely go to torres. 2nd wld be benayoun. benayoun was so "gerrard" today. lol, "gerrard" is my new way of saying godlike! LOL!!! seriously, he was running evrywhere, pokin thru the def like nobody's business. but torres is still the best, 2 touches, 1 goal, 1 assist. superb. simply outstanding, i wld haf to say torres was simply "torres". "torres" is my alternative for the best. LOL.
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
ok, now is ac milan match, mebbe i shld jus watch it since i'm still awake. I'M SO HAPPY NOW I CAN'T SLP. I WLDN'T BELIEVE THAT U'RE SLPING IF U'RE A LIVERPOOL FAN! CUZ YOU'LL NEVER SLEEP ALONE! HAHAHA!
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
emo day ended in an outstanding day for me. I LOVE LIVERPOOL! i wanna go dere to work after i graduate. haha. muz find a job there. even better if there's internship chance over there. COME ON U REDS! and ya, i'm glad that i didn't stay on for lan with zhou peng they all, else i wldn't be able to watch such a great match.
YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE!
emo day
emo day, but i dunno exactly why. perhaps i'll find an explaination along the way of this long blog entry of the events of today. btw, i'm not exactly emo becuz of anything that happened today.
ok, here it goes. after 4i outing, i wld say it's half successful, half unsuccessful. why? cuz firz of all, lotsa ppl turned up, but on the other hand, it was like wad it was in the past when we were still classmates. ie to say, girls are girls, boys are boys, no real interaction except for mebbe takin photos? but not bad la, seeing ppl that i haf not seen for a long time, finding out abt wad they had been doin and stuff. kinda made me wanna ask them out again, and so i organised this lan outing nxt wk, partly becuz zhou peng like to play dota. LOL.
ok, then went to shop for liane's bday present. realised how much i do not noe abt her at all. not a single bit, can't even think of wad she wld like for her bday present. well, eventually settled for something which i consider was not bad. and this again, made me think that perhaps i shld get to noe my frens better. ok, then while shopping, eugene wong suddenly ask me any plans for valentine's day. and of cuz my answer was no. then he had to remind me about the valentine's day in 2004. he was talkin about all the stuff that happened in the day on that day. but i was inevitably reminded of wad happened in the night. that "break-up" email, me cryin whole night, "her" trying all her best to make me happy. really emo. man, it's like, u spent 3 yrs, from like, to love, but it ended with zero. hai. then from there on, of cuz i was reminded of wadeva that happened between me and "her". from valentine to 6thMarch, to 12thApril. not emo oso cannot.
ok, then at liane's bday party. saw lotsa co guys. went there with zhiqi and eugene. then saw wei quan. cool that we still remember each other. and i realised all guys talk abt one thing. when u ORD. what unit you're from. and apparently evryone noes my unit cuz of cd which evryone needs to go thru. ok, then saw lerxian. so lerxian me and wq started talkin abt army, liverpool and the past in rv. man, hafta agree with them on one thing, i really missed those days in rvco, playin bball day in day out. those saturdays, coming early at 630 to play bball, lunch break oso play for half an hour, then go inside co room get scolded by conductor for sweatin and stuff, after co oso play. i really liked those days, really, seriously, those days were the best in my life. then while talkin abt liverpool, we decided to meet each other up for the liv-man u game at harry's bar. so now, i've got the 2 of them, kenneth and shiyong. hopefully can jio more ppl ba.
haha, really enjoy these kinda get together sessions. hope more come up in the coming months while i'm pretty free. haha
ok, here it goes. after 4i outing, i wld say it's half successful, half unsuccessful. why? cuz firz of all, lotsa ppl turned up, but on the other hand, it was like wad it was in the past when we were still classmates. ie to say, girls are girls, boys are boys, no real interaction except for mebbe takin photos? but not bad la, seeing ppl that i haf not seen for a long time, finding out abt wad they had been doin and stuff. kinda made me wanna ask them out again, and so i organised this lan outing nxt wk, partly becuz zhou peng like to play dota. LOL.
ok, then went to shop for liane's bday present. realised how much i do not noe abt her at all. not a single bit, can't even think of wad she wld like for her bday present. well, eventually settled for something which i consider was not bad. and this again, made me think that perhaps i shld get to noe my frens better. ok, then while shopping, eugene wong suddenly ask me any plans for valentine's day. and of cuz my answer was no. then he had to remind me about the valentine's day in 2004. he was talkin about all the stuff that happened in the day on that day. but i was inevitably reminded of wad happened in the night. that "break-up" email, me cryin whole night, "her" trying all her best to make me happy. really emo. man, it's like, u spent 3 yrs, from like, to love, but it ended with zero. hai. then from there on, of cuz i was reminded of wadeva that happened between me and "her". from valentine to 6thMarch, to 12thApril. not emo oso cannot.
ok, then at liane's bday party. saw lotsa co guys. went there with zhiqi and eugene. then saw wei quan. cool that we still remember each other. and i realised all guys talk abt one thing. when u ORD. what unit you're from. and apparently evryone noes my unit cuz of cd which evryone needs to go thru. ok, then saw lerxian. so lerxian me and wq started talkin abt army, liverpool and the past in rv. man, hafta agree with them on one thing, i really missed those days in rvco, playin bball day in day out. those saturdays, coming early at 630 to play bball, lunch break oso play for half an hour, then go inside co room get scolded by conductor for sweatin and stuff, after co oso play. i really liked those days, really, seriously, those days were the best in my life. then while talkin abt liverpool, we decided to meet each other up for the liv-man u game at harry's bar. so now, i've got the 2 of them, kenneth and shiyong. hopefully can jio more ppl ba.
haha, really enjoy these kinda get together sessions. hope more come up in the coming months while i'm pretty free. haha
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
interesting
wells, got some interesting stuff from the liv-che match.
#1: Bosingwa kicks Benayoun
#2: Torres celebrating goal!
#3: Torres Bounce
#1: Bosingwa kicks Benayoun
#2: Torres celebrating goal!
#3: Torres Bounce
Monday, February 02, 2009
Liverpool 2 - 0 Chelsea
What a great match!!! watched it at harry's bar yest nite with kenneth and his fren and his fren's fren and kenneth's dad. i was pretty high thruout the match, thot we played great. forced plenty of saves from cech. but kuyt was disappointing. and guess wad, somehow i knew it wld haf to be torres to score the winning goal, or rather goals! shall not talk much..so enjoy!
hahaha..dun haf the goals with me now cuz can't seem to embed it. so shall continue talking cock.
well, the atmosphere at the bar was superb. except for that stupid china man faking british accent at the back saying, "come on, you reds." irritating but o wells, muz gif him credit for being able to fake some decent british accent. as usual, started off with "you'll never walk alone". after that not many chants cuz not alot of ppl. and when someone actually starts singing, normally u wld see liverpool going for goal and it wld jus stop dead after the firz line. LOL. turning point wld be sending off of lampard. evryone was like, "COME ON!" haha. so high, everyone jumping, doing high 5s and stuff as if we won the match. though some might be reminded by the arsenal match when adebayor was sent off, i set my faith in rafa. once again, he didn't let me down when i believed. on came benayoun, wad a difference he made. made me change my valuation of him. he's seriously proving himself in the last few games. last season it was babel, this season it's benayoun. and wells, b4 the match i was predicting a 3-0 scoreline, ie a hat trick by torres. he almost got it, it cld have easily been 5-0 if not for cech and alex. LOL. chelsea's 4 men defence seriously felt like 2 men, alex and bosingwa. alex was good but bosingwa was totally bullshit. and he shld haf gotten a red for the kick in the butt on benayoun.
i guess it was a great game to signal torres' return to form and our run for the title. but the greatest liverpool game would still be gerrard final (champs league 2005) and perhaps the FA ver. of gerrard final. LOL. o wells, lookin forward to the man u match on mar 14. hopefully can jio more ppl to watch. and that date is quite near to mar 6 oso, LOL.
hahaha..dun haf the goals with me now cuz can't seem to embed it. so shall continue talking cock.
well, the atmosphere at the bar was superb. except for that stupid china man faking british accent at the back saying, "come on, you reds." irritating but o wells, muz gif him credit for being able to fake some decent british accent. as usual, started off with "you'll never walk alone". after that not many chants cuz not alot of ppl. and when someone actually starts singing, normally u wld see liverpool going for goal and it wld jus stop dead after the firz line. LOL. turning point wld be sending off of lampard. evryone was like, "COME ON!" haha. so high, everyone jumping, doing high 5s and stuff as if we won the match. though some might be reminded by the arsenal match when adebayor was sent off, i set my faith in rafa. once again, he didn't let me down when i believed. on came benayoun, wad a difference he made. made me change my valuation of him. he's seriously proving himself in the last few games. last season it was babel, this season it's benayoun. and wells, b4 the match i was predicting a 3-0 scoreline, ie a hat trick by torres. he almost got it, it cld have easily been 5-0 if not for cech and alex. LOL. chelsea's 4 men defence seriously felt like 2 men, alex and bosingwa. alex was good but bosingwa was totally bullshit. and he shld haf gotten a red for the kick in the butt on benayoun.
i guess it was a great game to signal torres' return to form and our run for the title. but the greatest liverpool game would still be gerrard final (champs league 2005) and perhaps the FA ver. of gerrard final. LOL. o wells, lookin forward to the man u match on mar 14. hopefully can jio more ppl to watch. and that date is quite near to mar 6 oso, LOL.
Friday, January 30, 2009
pissed
ok, this time i'm freakin pissed. not by customers, but by fans thousands of miles away from singapore. can't believe they are saying these things when they call themselves true fans of liverpool. saying that rafa shld leave, complaining about this and that. o well, let's state the facts firz.
fact #1 :
who won the champions league for us in 2005? who made the impossible possible with his incredible tatics? who made the strongest comeback in champions league history which turned out to be the best final in all competitions? it's rafa! for god's sake, stop looking at current form and saying that rafa sux. look at what he has done for us. yes, i do agree that it was a wrong choice to leave babel on the field while taking off torres. i would haf opted for reira replacing babel. and probably keane for torres later on. and benayoun shldn't haf being taken off though i've never been a real supporter of benayoun. and gerrard, shld never haf been taken off in the firz place. ok, he's tired, i take it for that.
fact #2 :
why in the firz place do u think torres is doing in liverpool? it's because of rafa! look at the facts, if rafa wasn't here, would we get a star striker who was able to score so many goals in his debut season in epl? NO! give rafa some credit for signing one of the greatest player liverpool has ever seen in recent years, at least from 2000 onwards.
fact #3 :
it is a fact that liverpool's squad ain't strong enough, that if one or 2 firz team players are replaced, it's hard for us to control the game. but whose fault is it? it's certainly not rafa. he has been constantly saying that he wants control over transfers, and that is because he feels that the squad needs strengthening. the barry saga was one good example of that. agger is another one too. keane, in my opinion is a good player. what's happening though, is that he does not fit into rafa's formation. rather, he would fit into my formation of what liverpool shld be having. i'll discuss that formation later.
so basically, what i'm trying to say is, stick behind rafa and his team for the time being, at least a season or 2. if rafa could get his hands on the transfers he wants, i'm sure he can push liverpool even further.
as for the thing about lucas, u can't blame him jus because he committed that foul on thur morning that gave away that crucial penalty. look at him in the first half and before 80th minute. his passes were great and all, so why can't we jus gif him credit. stop blaming him.
and here's wad i think liverpool's formation shld be, a rather traditional 4-4-2.
------------------------------Torres-----------------
------------Keane------------------------------------
----------------------Gerrard------------------------
---Reira--------------------------------------Kuyt---
------------------Alonso/Mascherano----------------
----Insua---------------------------------Arbeloa---
---------------Agger-----------Carragher------------
-----------------------Reina-------------------------
ok, explaination, in my opinion, keane would work well when he's a support striker behind torres. with gerrard linking up midfield and the strikers like wad he's doing now in the 4-2-3-1 formation rafa's having. he can easily find torres or keane up front. kuyt, as always, will jus keep patrolling the right flank. tire out the defenders so that torres can easily make his runs. reira can dominate the left flank with his skills and make some wonderful crosses for keane and torres. as for holding midfielder, one is enough, alonso or mash would be good. the wing backs is wad we are lacking, and the best we have now is insua and arbeloa i guess. agger over skrtl. to me, agger is much more stronger, though he tends to drift away from his position to attack. but that's wad i want, attack! skrtl tends to sit back. besides, agger has more speed. carragher is definitely there cause of his experience. reina, i guess i dunnit to explain.
to all liverpool fans out there, it's jus been a few weeks of poor draws and u all start to think so negatively. at the very least, we are challenging for the title. a win this sunday against chelsea and we wld be still in it. so just believe in liverpool, believe in rafa. quote from stevie G :
"Are we out of the title race? No, we're not," said the 28-year-old, who is Liverpool's top scorer with 15 this season. "If anything, the couple of setbacks we've had lately just make us even more determined to get back on track. "We're nobody's favourites for the Premier League title but we don't really care. We're in the mix and that's where you want to be. "We've got a great chance this season – probably the best in my time in the first team – and we believe in ourselves. "There's a lot of pressure that comes with being in our position but we think we can cope with that. We're confident we can match United and Chelsea stride for stride and then see what happens in the closing stages of the campaign."
believe, cuz this is anfield.
fact #1 :
who won the champions league for us in 2005? who made the impossible possible with his incredible tatics? who made the strongest comeback in champions league history which turned out to be the best final in all competitions? it's rafa! for god's sake, stop looking at current form and saying that rafa sux. look at what he has done for us. yes, i do agree that it was a wrong choice to leave babel on the field while taking off torres. i would haf opted for reira replacing babel. and probably keane for torres later on. and benayoun shldn't haf being taken off though i've never been a real supporter of benayoun. and gerrard, shld never haf been taken off in the firz place. ok, he's tired, i take it for that.
fact #2 :
why in the firz place do u think torres is doing in liverpool? it's because of rafa! look at the facts, if rafa wasn't here, would we get a star striker who was able to score so many goals in his debut season in epl? NO! give rafa some credit for signing one of the greatest player liverpool has ever seen in recent years, at least from 2000 onwards.
fact #3 :
it is a fact that liverpool's squad ain't strong enough, that if one or 2 firz team players are replaced, it's hard for us to control the game. but whose fault is it? it's certainly not rafa. he has been constantly saying that he wants control over transfers, and that is because he feels that the squad needs strengthening. the barry saga was one good example of that. agger is another one too. keane, in my opinion is a good player. what's happening though, is that he does not fit into rafa's formation. rather, he would fit into my formation of what liverpool shld be having. i'll discuss that formation later.
so basically, what i'm trying to say is, stick behind rafa and his team for the time being, at least a season or 2. if rafa could get his hands on the transfers he wants, i'm sure he can push liverpool even further.
as for the thing about lucas, u can't blame him jus because he committed that foul on thur morning that gave away that crucial penalty. look at him in the first half and before 80th minute. his passes were great and all, so why can't we jus gif him credit. stop blaming him.
and here's wad i think liverpool's formation shld be, a rather traditional 4-4-2.
------------------------------Torres-----------------
------------Keane------------------------------------
----------------------Gerrard------------------------
---Reira--------------------------------------Kuyt---
------------------Alonso/Mascherano----------------
----Insua---------------------------------Arbeloa---
---------------Agger-----------Carragher------------
-----------------------Reina-------------------------
ok, explaination, in my opinion, keane would work well when he's a support striker behind torres. with gerrard linking up midfield and the strikers like wad he's doing now in the 4-2-3-1 formation rafa's having. he can easily find torres or keane up front. kuyt, as always, will jus keep patrolling the right flank. tire out the defenders so that torres can easily make his runs. reira can dominate the left flank with his skills and make some wonderful crosses for keane and torres. as for holding midfielder, one is enough, alonso or mash would be good. the wing backs is wad we are lacking, and the best we have now is insua and arbeloa i guess. agger over skrtl. to me, agger is much more stronger, though he tends to drift away from his position to attack. but that's wad i want, attack! skrtl tends to sit back. besides, agger has more speed. carragher is definitely there cause of his experience. reina, i guess i dunnit to explain.
to all liverpool fans out there, it's jus been a few weeks of poor draws and u all start to think so negatively. at the very least, we are challenging for the title. a win this sunday against chelsea and we wld be still in it. so just believe in liverpool, believe in rafa. quote from stevie G :
"Are we out of the title race? No, we're not," said the 28-year-old, who is Liverpool's top scorer with 15 this season. "If anything, the couple of setbacks we've had lately just make us even more determined to get back on track. "We're nobody's favourites for the Premier League title but we don't really care. We're in the mix and that's where you want to be. "We've got a great chance this season – probably the best in my time in the first team – and we believe in ourselves. "There's a lot of pressure that comes with being in our position but we think we can cope with that. We're confident we can match United and Chelsea stride for stride and then see what happens in the closing stages of the campaign."
believe, cuz this is anfield.
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