四手联弹

Thinking of a melody for the midi project for SOM. Ended up looking through the songs I've written in the past, and chanced upon this gem. First of all, the melody for this was one of the better ones I had. And I thought the lyrics were really great.

Written in 2010, I was probably in year 1 sem 1. I can't even remember what happened back them already. All the memories are so vague right now. People coming and people going, sometimes, you just want to forget all these and start anew, leaving behind all those who have gone, and letting only those who care stay with you.

Its just that hard to let go? After all those times spent together, after caring so much for somebody, you just have to let go. Simply because the other party does not care anymore. No matter what you do, things won't go back to the way they were. Deep down inside, I know it, that this is it, I have to let go. But somehow, the slightly hopeful me still wishes for a miracle to happen, that somehow, I would be forgiven, and things would go back to normal. I know my mistakes, I know what I've done wrong, but knowing all these now are a bit too late, I guess? 

I wanted to talk about it, but there's just so many things catching up with me right now. FYP, insomnia, midi project, game project, final lab for openGL. Just so many things, so much stress, and the only way I'm letting all these stress out is by playing late into the night, slping for 4 hours, and get back up to start doing work again. Probably would have been better if there was someone there to talk to? Is it that hard to have someone to care for me?

Under all this facade of smiles that I put up in front of people everyday, is just one single fragile soul. I tend to act tough, but really, all I need is to have someone to talk to?

Sigh, what's worse is the fact that the only thing that kept me going throughout the sem was someone to talk to through the late night working. Now that she's gone, owell.. 

Yuan Ing, its really time to let go.

Whatever that made me write this line 3 years ago, its probably the same feeling as right now. "没有你陪在我身边四手联弹不再完美, 我只能一个人守着诺言"

And I saw this tweet, haha, couldn't be truer. "Me: I'm happy right now. Life: lol one sec"

Life just has its ways of making you live the unexpected. To think that 2 weeks ago, we were still chatting happily, and now its just Q&A sessions between us. sighh

And here's the song, directly copied from my song blog, tgt with the notes. =/

钢琴

望着那陈旧的钢琴
它的轮廓不禁让人觉得孤单
它曾经带给我们许多回忆
也随着音乐的声音而离去

放在钢琴上面的琴谱
五线谱上跳着一颗颗的豆芽
诉说着过去曾有过的甜蜜
却随着时间的流逝而淡去

钢琴上的黑键 就像是你我的爱
说少不少其实也并不算多
钢琴上的白键 就像是你的诺言
参差这的黑键 都是你的谎言

我想我已懂得 爱情不是一个人
就能够弹奏出的幸福旋律
没有你陪在我身边
四手联弹不再完美
我只能一个人守着诺言

我想我已懂得 孤单只是我一人
我的世界只剩下一种快乐
那是你给我的温柔
我会永远放在心中
我答应你我会永远守候
我给你的承诺

Notes: 你又不敢对她说出你的爱，那你又为何而流泪? 我只能一个人守着诺言.