The only thing I see that's great about this new year is how the last two digits are 13, which happens to be my favourite number. Well, usually the start of the year post would be full of resolutions and shit, but I guess I pretty much decided what I needed to do for the year anyway, so let's move on with that first. Well, obviously, to graduate is on the books, and to get a job too. That razer job is definitely one of the jobs i'm really interested in. Whereas the MDA US internship thingy seems to be off cuz of how the program seem to be off the uni plans now. Other than that, my life, well, I hate to say this, but its kinda boring. But well, as long as I can get that job, I guess the rest doesn't matter at all.
Afterall, I'm kinda just over with all the love and shit that has happened in the 4 years of uni life. Doesn't seem that much important to me anymore. Over the 4 years, I've realised how realistic this world is. People would only talk to you when they need your help. They act all nice when they need you, but once they're done with you, they throw you aside like you never really mattered to them. I don't really blame these people, I know its not their fault. At the end of the day, I treat people the same way, every man for himself. If there's one person I would blame, it would be myself, for being so eager when it comes to helping people. Just a simple "please" or something like that would be able to get me started on helping people, to the extent that I would say I'm not sleeping when I'm already ready to get off my com and go to bed. And just a simple thank you after that would make it seem worth it to me. So yeah, I'm that easy for people to take advantage of. I'm not complaining, I'm just saying. And I don't think this part of me is something I can change easily, I'll just continue helping people, even though I know that once they don't need me anymore, they'll just kick me aside. But, what can I do? Do i sit in one corner and cry as I watch these people leave my life? NO. I'll just continue to be myself, and if people choose to leave me, then so be it. I would rather people remember me for being the helpful one, than the one who didn't want to help, that is, if they remember me at all.
Then there's always the question of, if I die today, who will remember me tomorrow, who will remember me in 1 week/1month/1year/10years/so on and so forth. Did I live a life where people would remember me? If they do, then how would they remember me as? But then again, if I'm dead, would that really matter?
Man, what's in me tonight. I should get to sleep soon. But no, I'm helping someone =/
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