improved version

here it goes..the full song..


Fuck-up


growing up it ain't that nice to be
standing up trying to relive my dreams
feeling sad cuz i ain't that happy
angered me cuz it's A FUCK-UP world


sometimes u wake up to reality
and it seems that there's nothing worth to live
this is life and there ain't nothing to do
juz becoz it is a FUCK-UP world


Chorus:
sometimes u know it's true babe
that this is a fuck-up world
there is nothing u can do
to make a change to the world


and this is the truth baby
u juz have to face it babe
and in this world there is no one
for u to trust fully


Written by fallen reason ©2006. fallen reason is a registered trademark in the name of Chow Yuan Ing. Protected by copyright laws.


k..that's all..up till the chorus..i guess the whole song wld juz repeat the above then it's done le ba..haha..unless i go think of a second verse for it..and mebbe a rap so that the song wld have a climax..haha..

firz song

haha..into writing lyrics now..surprised that the firz song i writing is in english..lol..but it's cuz this com doesn't read chinese so i typed something out in el..lol..k..here it goes..


Fuck-up


growing up it ain't that nice to be
standing up trying to relive my dreams
feeling sad cuz i ain't that happy
angered me cuz it's A FUCK-UP world


sometimes u wake up to reality
and it seems that there's nothing worth to live
this is life and there ain't nothing to do
juz becoz it is a FUCK-UP world



k..that's halfway thru..hopefully it'll turn out nice..tried it out by singing out myself..quite nice too..haha..vulgarity can sound gentle too..=D

zzz

the reason has fallen..can't take it animore..this world is full of fuckers..damn fucking fuckers..trust no one..except ur family..all else are fuckers.fuckers fuckers fuckers..damn fuck-up behaviour..fuckers..


one day i mite juz wake up and find no one but fuckers in my life..lol..


k la..mebbe this is too generalised..at least still got some non-fuckers in this world..erm..like my family..eh..mok my gambling mate..er..lemme think..heckx..too many fuckers..lol..


fucking world..that's y there's so many fuckers..mebbe i shld get used to it..living arnd fuckers..fucking fuckers..


freaking tired of this life..live the life of a fucker so i'll blend into the fucking society?chee bai lan jiao..no way i'm gonna do that


setting me up in a fuck-up life with fuck-up past experiences in relationships..is that wad u have planned for my life?


wld i be happy?perhaps..but the sadness reigns..sadness 75%..anger23%..happiness 2%..fuck-up life..


and i thot my life was better when i had my second stead..at least i felt happy with her..but she didn't..she doubted me..fine..wadeva i do to explain wun save the situation..so fine..live on with my sad life..nothing's gonna make her turn back and help me pick up my broken pieces of heart..no way..


life is like a piece of junk thrash fuck-up rubbish chute..juz down and nv up..


if i can get over it that ezily..it wld juz be so nice..


ppl who i called buddies..brothers..fuck..pang seh ppl..that's all they noe how to do..juz pang seh..nvm..i'm used to it..pang seh..pang seh lor..then i go home slp only ma..so frenship is all abt who pang seh each other most rite?then the one who pang seh the most is the best fren..lol..ic ic..so i muz pang seh ppl le lo..fuck u idiots..


my life is no longer simple..it mite seem like my life when i was 13..but it's still different..at least there were no scars when i was 13..


fallen reason

pang seh kia

PANG SEH KIA!!!BASTARDS THEY ARE..KPKB!!

lol

woehoex..it's like sec sch life..bball with mong after co prac on saturdays..SO FUN!!!lol..and for some tyco reason..i managed to score abt like 5-7 three-pointers today out of like 10-15 i think..LOL..damn tyco..haha..so fun..haha..i'll do that evry saturday le..BBALL!!!YEAYEAYEA!!!


after bball went eat mac with co ppl..lol..and i was bz making fun abt emily and OJ(a.k.a cheng zhi..stands for orange juice..haha)..can't believe my gossiping skills so zai..hee..


fun..lol

erm.

haha..k..the post i posted like erm..3 days ago i think..i guess it was kinda crap..this kinda thing happens when u think too much..lol..but i'm fine now le..realli..


now..mugger mode..haha..but once in a while some dota or maple here and there will help me relax..LOL..


wahaha..and guess wad..LTJ is like so kepo..he like go tell evry class he teach that he scolded us lo..LOL..but nvm..we were in the wrong too..most of us didn't do..so it was kinda right for him to scold i guess..


and ya..i'm beginning to like fmb..haha..so fun..with probability..but i can bet when it comes to poisson it's gonna be difficult manz..haha..heckx..take it one step at a time..fma sux now..cuz it's related to physics..it's like..zzzzzzzz..so boring..now the situation has changed from last yr..last yr evryone likes fma more than fmb..now it has turned the other way round..haha..muz strike a balance ya..haha..


wahaha..and mok and i had this funny mix-up of identity with 2 new jc1 gals from st nicks who joined co..lol..he thot i was tokking abt one when in actual fact i was tokking abt the other one..lol..but heckx..haha..aniwaes..post a qsn here..mok..is the thing abt me being promoted to SL official or wad..zzzz..


and ya..tokking abt juniors and perc section..haha..the 2 guys who were supposedly inside..one quitting after concert..the other one..f..guess wad he told me when i called him.."i dun feel like joining.."..k..fine..afterall..4 yrs of co in sec sch can realli make a guy bored..haiz..puzzled that i'm still stuck in co after 5 yrs..LOL..but nvm..if u can't brush it aside..learn to appreciate it..and i'm trying my best to now..haha..at least got a chio one which mong said la..lol..CNY performance most prob gonna be a big prob..with only tml's prac left..hmmmz..CNY=CMI??lol..hopefully will make it la ya..co muz jiayoux..


LOL..sounds strange to hear that from a guy who ponned for so long in jc1..LOL..turn over a new leaf..hahax..lol..

LOL

k la..mong..i let u hear wad u wanna hear..our tastes are the same la..happy??LOL..


crush can..HAHA..


k la..i realli dunno wad i'm thinking now..and i dun wanna think too much..juz let nature take its own course on me..some things lost are juz lost..i shall juz leave it now..leave my past..looking forward..to perhaps a peaceful day..

why shld i be happy??

seriously..why shld i be happy?


i can find a hundred reasons why i shld be sad with my life..but i find it hard even to find ONE single reason to be happy with my life..tell me WHY..WTF..


when i have time..i'll juz list out the 100 reasons..if aniwan can gimme 10 good reasons that i can accept abt why i shld be happy..perhaps i wld be happy..but now..NO..i'm not happy..i shld be sad..


F u chee bai lan jiao arsehole ppl who live in this fuck-up world with fuck-up chee bai lan jiao kah jiao-ing ur live like dunno wad fuck-up shit when all u want is juz to live a fuckin peaceful life..so knnbccb la..FUCK-UP..kpkb..


lol..i''m back..seriously..back to my old self..vulgar me..mugger me..trust-no-one me..promises are made to be broken..and seriously i shall juz do that..since no one has so far fullfilled their promises to me..and i say NO ONE..promosing u to help u find certain thing..but when u ask him/her for it..he/she wld juz ignore u..FUCK-UP la..kpkb..


promising u to be there..but when u need them..they're not there for u..fuck-up world..


the only way i can hide this fuck-up feelings inside me is thru studies and perhaps some occasional bball..old me..thirteen-yr-old me..vulgar me..mugger me..


and ya..i've realised my taste is quite the same as liang mong..at firz sight la..but after much observation..it wld move more towards patrick's kinda taste..LOL


one sad thing..after 2 yrs..tho not exactly 2 yrs yet..u're the only one who i can rmm the date that we started..6thMarch..can u like..tell me y??..and it ended on 12thApril..cuz it's significant?cuz i still have feelings for u??i do not noe..but u wld nvr noe..u wld nvr look back again..i guess if i ask u the same qsn like i've asked 2 yrs ago on 12thApril, ur answer wld still be the same..and ur answer will still be no..but i realli wanna ask u the qsn again..and i hope the answer wld be yes and that u wld hint me again by saying that u're listening to that song again..shuo ai ni..it juz means so much to me..but i doubt u wld ever noe..and now i noe y i fail in the relationships so far..cuz i still can't forget u..my heart can't accomodate another one when u're still takin up that place..when will i truly forget..when..i was 16 then..but i'm 18 now..my thinking has matured..but my feelings for u are still true and present..even till now..i realli hope that i have the chance to explain wad exactly happened 2 yrs back..and that i've nvr like wad u've said..jio-ing other gals when i say i like one gal..it's not true..but wld u ever believe me??after 2 yrs..will u still believe me..the one that u've once trusted..the one u've once called "ing ing" or papa b4 6thMarch..will u..haiz..i tot i've forgotten u but evrytime i kenna rejection by gal..i'll realise..i still have feelings for u..and i noe that is my true feeling..and the feeling i have for other gals is juz a false impression i'm trying to have so that i wld make myself believe that i've forgotten u when in actual fact..i haven't..i didn't do anithing to u in these 2 yrs..didn't tell u al these..cuz i'm scared..that my heart wld be once again broken..i realli dun dare..i dun dare to hear u say no again to me..perhaps i've broken ur heart 2 yrs back..or mebbe i didn't..but i always tot our feelings for each other was true then and i've nvr doubted it..at least for that one month..it was mutual..i'll ask this qsn again..if u happen to be reading this..will u gimme a chance again?


but i guess ur ans wld be "no, and never in the future.." like wad u've said 2 yrs back..that's y i dun dare to ask..realli dun dare..u shld noe who u are..if u happen to read this..cuz it's the song "shuo ai ni" that made me dare tell u..i realli..dunno wad to do..haiz..

zzzz

zzzz..nothing much to say..juz that..i've realised something..evrytime patrick toks abt a gal..it wld make us realise how true it is..haha..

keke

i've been thinking..wad if i stayed in nj..if i gotten 9 instead of 10..wondering..


hmmmz..firz of all..i wld most probably take back my combi of double maths physics com sci..ending up in the same class as alan, wei guang, yi hang, de wei, fang jian, darren..hmmz..did i miss out aniwan?..hopefully not..k..i'll be mugging non-stop i guess..still in co, it club..and probably joining pa as well..shld have passed my promos since if i am in nj..i wld be mugging..non-stop


i wldn't be playing dota so often if i'm in nj..ehh..mebbe more of mahjong since darren lives nearby..haiz..


eh..i wldn't have known liang mong, marvin..meaning i wldn't be workin at taka for the school hols..and probably not workin for the sch hols at all..cuz most prob gonna be in sch for cca..and mugging for j2..lol..wldn't have gone thru this much..but most prob..wad happened on 2nd jan wld still happen..


if only..if only..hmmmz..heckX..wad's happened has alr happened..no point thinkin abt it i guess..but y am i still havin regrets of leavin nj..y..i'm juz..haiz..wad's done cannot be undone..that's so true..but the pain is there..and time does not seem to heal it..perhaps i shld have stayed in nj arts..heckx..

100th hour anniversary?

haha..missed it..the 100..but nvm..hee..


eh..friday huh..haha..finalli..lol..


haha..k la..shall not tok abt wadeva that happened in sch today..nothing much aniwaes..haha


my color for the month is a color called fuchsia..accordin to teenage magazine..or was it teens..heckx..it's actualli some kinda pink..LOL..pink siah..lol..and it's pronounced as "fuck siah"..accordin to cheng han la..cuz dunno which day he used this color as his font..then he was saying it's pronounced as that..and i was like..wtf..pink..and to think that it's my lucky color for the month.."fuck siah"..haha..=p..can't criticise pink..later ppl bash me up..hahax..=x..

haha..wadeva

borin..went home immediately after sch..so tired..didn't noe got co til mong called me..but alr on bus le..ha..


haiz..didn't go aniwhere special today..didn't do anithing special today..and it's 80.5 le..ha..reaching hundred soon..


sch is starting to get more fun..fun making fun of lydon..fun during fma and fmb..where the 2 rather middle-aged tchers can suan u like dunno wad siaoz..then mr khoo as good as ever..letting us go home cuz it was raining and j1s were using the track to play games..haha..bez tcher gonna be mr khoo manz..and ya..ms soh too..haha..funny as ever..nice as ever..well..most sa tchers are good ba..i guess.lol


zzzz..wp and marv keep on saying yang cheng lin..aka rainie is chio..k la..she's chio la..but got hebe chio meh?haha..mebbe different ppl different tastes ba..but hebe is chio..haha..better than rainie..to me la..at least..haha..but hor..muz say selina is chio-er than hebe lahx..else someone angry..=pPp..


yea..new blogskin..ninja.ha

70

70 hrs..diaoX..eh..today k la..got cca..zzzz..co..zzzz..not that i dun like co..but..zzzz..juz very tired la..haha..


well..co ended rather early today at 5.30..but still late to get to there alr..so sorry..haha..so decided to go walk walk..went comics connection at toa payoh..ehh..saw this ff7ac collectibles..the casing was the one u wld c at ff7ac website..the cloud and sephiroth one..inside..there's this sword that cloud uses in ac..a ring with the head thing that can be seen on cloud's clothes in the movie..and a necklace that was nv seen b4 in the movie..and u call that a collectible series..i wld rather have cloud's swords..haha..13.90 la..for these 3 things..so duh..didn't buy in the end..haha..but it rekindled my ff7ac flame..haha..gonna go arnd looking for cloud's swords when i have time le..haha..ff7ac juz rox..lol..get it for me la k?haha..j/k j/k

36

36..yea..36..lol seriously i hate running abt bukit timah..firz of all..i hate it when i'm surrounded by ppl from nj and hc..feel so inferior..like surrounded by smart ppl..tho i'm not stupid..haha..but the uniform truly matters..haha..mebbe nxt time i go down bukit timah area i shld wear muh nj uniform..haha.. k la..i was happy k?haha..ty ty ty..haha..=D.. zzz..tired la..firz day at sch as j2 alr so borin..trained arnd 30-40 minutes to get to toa payoh then took bus for like 20 minutes?whole journey from home to school took abt 1hr plus..imagine this..u leave home at 5.50 where the sky was still very dark and the play ground looked eerie..then u reach ur sch at 7.00 plus where the sky is bright and u can hear the birds chirping happily..wtf..POTONG PASIR LEH..uncle..or aunty..who the f suggested moving back to sa as a family..zzzzzzz..so far away..haiz..seriously needta get myself an mp3 player to kill time on the mrt liaoz..hiakX.. nj outing was rather fun today..all the ppl..so long nv c le still so chatty..then saw this bunch of rv ppl come sit inside mac at the kap..zzz..wah seh..got this guy with gold hair..wtf..chee bong..rv de leh..hols still go dye hair..it's like..wtf..throw face arh..kpkb..the bunch of rv ppl were sitting like wad freakin thing la..the way they sit is like ah beng ah lian liddat..then the gals still can put one feet on the sofa or wadeva u call it la..cushioned chair??haha..then like some san1 lun2 che1 fu1 liddat..so lian..(not tokking abt u la..the ones sitting at 2nd floor..didn't even c u til i went down..zzz..)aniwaes..i'm surprised only one og turned up at kap today..haha..boring..perhaps firz day la..not as a class yet..so mebbe only some super enthu og wld turn up at kap to have dinner..LOL


more hours ahead..zzz..haha..but i'm enjoying it..lol..my j2 life..2006..LOL

haha

YAY..hee..happy happy happy new yr to myself..good start..lol


9 hrs from this blog post..thanx for the great timing..ez to remember..haha..lol


tsk tsk..


haha..see alot of ppl write new yr resolutions..so i shall write too..haha..a belated one tho..lol


1st wish: pass muh a lvls


2nd wish: happy family


3rd wish: eh..hee..tsk tsk..=P


4th wish: continue on muh comic collection


5th wish: get my ps3..hopefully it doesn't come too late to become muh 2007 new yr resolution


k..i'm a man with simple wishes..not too many..haha..hopefully all can be fullfilled..hee..

happy happy me

happy man now..and u're a sad gal now..haha..


but ur sad life ain't gonna bother my happy life animore..cuz i've juz decided to get over this and carry on my life..cuz u're juz so so so not worth muh love..and time..and effort..true that u've once broken muh heart..but i'm not gonna let it be hurt by u again..juz treat it as i've spent my time on u to learn a lesson..look thru someone thoroughly b4 deciding to do so much for someone..but i'll nvr regret noeing u..u mite not be a perfect partner..but u can be a fren..juz want u to take care of ur life..manage it properly..cuz it's getting bloody messy..truly messy..haha..can't think of an adjective for messy..k..plain messy..LOL..wadeva..live ur life this way if u want it to end up sad..


perhaps..i shldn't trust their words too much..but can i trust urs..afterall we've only known each other for one month..if wad they said is the true u..then i shldn't trust u animore..but if i believe wad i c for myself..then i shld trust u..but this will juz lead me into a loss in direction..dunno who to believe..so i told myself not to care..so i dunnit to be in such a demise..but can i realli not care?mebbe i shld juz observe the situation a little while more..u're not the only tree in this forest..i mite not be stuck to u 4eva..mebbe when i c the nxt tree..i'll move towards it..