same spider

saw the same spider crawling pass the same position infront of me in a minute. =.= reminded me of the cat that walked pass twice in the matrix. o.O scary~ haha. nah, back to topic.

Somehow, those late night walks by myself are killing my soul and my heart. Not becuz I don't like to walk, but its becuz of the lack of company on these late nights when I just feel like going out to see stars. Used to have, used to be, they're no longer what I have in my hands. Always reminded of the first time we went star gazing, how it used to remind us of the fireworks we saw together, that first... hai. Ok, why am I emo-ing now! Sucks to the max. If only stars have the same effect as they used to have on me. They used to brighten up my days, but now, they're just painful reminders of my past.

Was talking to huiru b4 i went to see stars last night. That one sentence i used to say alot, just came out again. That sentence i always used to cheer someone up. In a way, i've forgotten how to cheer ppl up, cuz most of the time, i found myself in need of it. But somehow, last night, this sentence came at the right time for me, just when I was about to go into the eternal state of emoism for the rest of the sem. "Stars are like true friends, even if there are times when you don't see them, you know they're always there." This one sentence, it used to mean alot. Not that it doesn't mean anything now, but the significance is not the same as b4.

Of cuz, the other version of that means nothing now at all. "Stars are like my true feelings for you, even if there are times when you cannot see what I am doing for you, you know my feelings will always be there for you." If only I could say it to someone now, if only.

All the "if-only"s. How long more am I going to use these 2 words before it finally becomes yes it is.

School started, new beginning. A different group of friends for lecture, will be spending the rest of the year with them. Need to treasure friendship. A need for an oweek comm outing, before everyone forgets about everyone else.

Needs someone to see stars with me. :(